Sexuality & Relationships: Same Sex

Regardless of how you identify (gay, straight, lesbian, bi, trans, intersex, questioning, queer, etc.), if you are sexually attracted to, in love, or intimate with someone of the same sex, you may be looking for some information particular to your health and that of your partner (or future partner).

Same sex relationships carry the same delights and burdens as other relationships. Other pages on this website offer sexuality-related information including sexual health care, disease prevention, sexual decisionmaking and maintaining abstinence. However, same sex couples may find there are additional issues that arise such as "coming out",  safety concerns, and rights related to health care access.  The LGBT Resource Center has lots if information on these and related issues.

Identity and coming out

Having a relationship with someone of the same sex can be challenging if individuals have different perspectives on their identity (what does our being together mean? are we gay?) or feel differently about "coming out" (the process of accepting the attraction that you feel and making that fact public). Visibility as a couple may be a concern. If you and your partner feel safe enough to express romantic feelings publicly there may be less stress to the relationship than if one of you feels unable to be yourself and share your feelings openly.

You may be especially concerned about  coming out to a healthcare provider. You should know that clinicians and nurses at Gannett will maintain confidentiality and are sensitive  to the fact that some patients may be reluctant  to share this information. If you are seeking a sexual health consult, we encourage you to confide in your healthcare provider openly about your sexual relationships so they can give you the best possible care; the care that you deserve.

Bias or homophobia concerns

You may have uncertainty about how people wll react if you tell them that your partner is someone of the same sex/gender. Some individuals find a range of reactions from wonderful to homophobic.  In some instances, people feel harassed or threatened by others who object to the fact they are with someone of the same sex or because they are percieved to be lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgendered.

At Cornell, there are policies that prohibit discriminaton based on sexual orientation and other factors. If you feel targeted by negative or threatening language, harassed or made to feel unafe in any way because you are coupled with someone of the same sex, there is a campus-wide bias reporting team that can provide information about what to do. You can also discuss incidents with the Victim Advocate.

Gannett is proud to be a co-sponsor of the Safe Place initiative at Cornell. Safe Place promotes the creation of a space defined by equality, free from discrimination and hate. It seeks to involve departments and individuals in a united effort to make the prevailing social climate of the Cornell community more inclusive and supportive of its lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and questioning members.

Legal rights for same sex couples (insurance, living will, healthcare proxy)

Men and women who are living with a same sex partner or are in a committed relationship can arrange legal protections related to medical care and treatment and get insurance coverage for domestic partners. The Human Rights Campaign, the National Center for Lesbian Rights, and the     National Gay and Lesbian Task Force have webpages that address insurance coverage for domestic partners, living wills, healthcare proxies and other     important legal matters.